12 movies that explain why i’m like this

i’m too lazy to make a letterboxd account but somehow not too lazy to believe my film taste is lowkey fire. like actually no. but according to my mental disorders? yes.

anyway, to be fair, i’ve loved stories my entire life, so the delulu kind of makes sense.

as a kid, i was always wandering around with a book partly because i loved disappearing into other worlds but mostly because holding a book let me dodge human interactions. at some point i realized i wasn’t just a “reader.” i was obsessed with any form of storytelling: movies, tv shows, documentaries, anime, SNL skits, the works. i don’t just love a book, i love a good narrative.

i had recently watched a film that finally completed my sacred top 12 movie list and because this revelation feels spiritually important, my first instinct was to announce it on my blog that literally no one reads 🤠

these five films reveal the particular brand of psychological dysfunction i enjoy so you know, do with that information what you will.

i’m listing these in no particular order. except for the last one. that one sits on a throne. that one is king.

#12: Inglorious Basterds

poster via this link. i own nothing except my opinion

we’re starting with a quentin tarantino film because peak cinema starts here. i’m sorry to say that every other opening scene is just mid (actually nolan’s tenet is a good contender) but i mean, come on—inglorious basterds’ opening scene alone could win an oscar for “best portrayal of anxiety” using nothing but great acting, atmospheric dread, and a glass of milk—all BEFORE the plot even starts.

so if you ever have to watch one movie scene that delivers exactly what a good film should evoke in a human body—fear, awe, dread, fascination—just watch the opening scene and you’ll feel your heartbeat in parts of your body that shouldn’t have heartbeats.

christophe waltz is insane in this role. i will never forget the way he says “monsieur lapadite…” like he’s politely peeling your skin off. that line haunts me at random times which i’ll probably be carrying on my deathbed ngl.